Toddlers are an emotional bunch, they don’t yet understand how to deal with their emotions and they sure don’t understand why they can’t do the ridiculous they want to do.
We’ve all been there a long day, a skipped nap, over-stimulation, not getting their way, being hungry, these are all reasons a toddler tantrum can happen and sometimes you don’t want to be the person in the middle of mall trying to pick up their heavy toddler while he kicks and punches you all while a bunch of people try to give you advice on how to raise your own child, and a back in my day children where seen and not heard.
I want Arren to always be heard, his voice will always echo in our house and I will always be an ear for his troubles, that doesn’t stop me from getting frustrated when he tantrums like crazy. I sometimes feel like I’m about to have my own toddler esque meltown right next to Arren with the same kind of body flinging.
but that’s unfortunately not how you get results.
We’ve managed to kick Arren’s temper tantrums to a minimum and it’s all just about making them feel heard. Just put yourself in a toddlers shoes, imagine not being able to move your body for so long, then being able to do a little bit more and now you get to run wild and free and really get your explore on. They don’t understand why they can’t do something, and to them it just doesn’t make sense and all you keep saying is no no no. If you think it’s frustrating being the parent of a toddler, imagine being one.
here are my tips for dealing with those toddler tantrums.
NEUTRALIZING A TODDLER TANTRUM
- Don’t overstimulate them, a lot of fun, lots of people and whole bunch of new food is a sure way to have an overstimulated toddler, and an overstimulated toddler is a ticking time bomb. If you have an overstimulated toddler, try boring them and relaxing them a bit.
- Never skip a nap. Sleep and toddlers go hand in hand, a cranky sleepy toddler will lead to cosmic meltdowns a skipped nap during the day, makes for a bad nights sleep, so force a nap if you have to, but don’t danger nap too late.
- Stay Calm. Easier said than done, sometimes your anger wants to take over, but that will just heighten the tantrum. Try being calm and speaking in a calm kind voice.
- Bribery. I know it’s not the bet option, but I’ve got a whole stroller full of bribes. Sometimes you just need a couple of snacks or toys to keep your toddler in that stroller.
- Toddlerese approach, we’ve been taking the happiest toddler on the block advice for a couple of months now and it works!
- Loosen the reigns. Sometimes saying no the whole time isn’t fair, try to say yes within reason, if he wants to swing a little longer or run into the ocean for the millionth time, let them do it.
- Don’t let them get hungry, a hungry toddler creates BIG HANGRY moments, always have snacks ready.
- Praise them. The more dramatically I praise Arren during the day, the less likely he is to throw a tantrum during the day.
- Teach your child how you would want to teach them. A moment of anger doesn’t create a positive learning moment.
- Don’t care so much what other people think. My most intense tantrum moment was when I carried out the most insane tantruming Arren like a big flinging bag of potatoes, while eating the bribery cookie that got thrown in my face, all while saying “what” to a bunch of old ladies shaking their heads. It was in that moment of motherhood that I stopped caring what other people thought. Figuring out motherhood and your child is your job, sometimes you’re going to have moments where you feel like breaking down, it’s best to laugh it off.