Mom guilt….It sneaks up on you

Mom guilt can happen to all of us, even a first time mother that stays at home with her little, but loud miracle.

 

Being a first time mother is stressful, you don’t know what you’re doing, the internet has a million different opinions so you just don’t know which one is right, and the constant bombardment of well meaning people giving you their opinion in a really judgy tone, making you’re already lack of sleep mind start to wonder…”Am I just a bad mother? I only have one child and I already feel this overwhelmed? We want four of them? I’m going to be a bald, bruised and just give them all candy to keep things under control!”

In reality I know there is no perfect mother out there, but we seem to hold ourselves to such high standards that it’s nearly impossible to reach, so we sit around beating ourselves up about it.

Yes, I feel completely overwhelmed most days and I only have one child?! That’s okay, I’m doing my best and getting into the groove of things, trying to keep a little human alive and thriving is hard work, especially when you don’t get enough sleep. I have an endless supply of laundry that I just can’t seem to get to and most days I get angry at cloth diapering, then I feel upset for even thinking about causing so much pollution! That’s okay, sometimes we just need to give ourselves a break.

The guilt just sneaks up on you, I feel guilty when I get overly excited when Carl gets home and I can have 30 minutes of not holding Arren.  I should want to hold him every second, but he’s heavy and I’m surprised I have any hair left after he’s screamed in my face and seemed to eat, pull and yank out the little bit of hair I have left postpartum.  I feel guilty when I get sick and I can’t give my all to him.  The constant thinking “has he had enough tummy time today?”, “Should I buy him more toys?” Should I, Should I, Should I!

Being a mother is hard and we more often than not beat ourselves up for no good reason, we are doing an incredible job!  So here is to kicking mom guilt to the curb! We are doing great! We are giving our children the best we can,  lets take it easy on the mom guilt!

4 thoughts on “Mom guilt….It sneaks up on you

  1. Emily says:

    From the looks of it you’re doing wonderfully! Give yourself grace and do your best. Arren is going to be a wonderful kid (and beyond).

    • Melissa says:

      Thank you! Its just strange going from having all the you time you can possibly handle to non at all! , but I love having my personal space invaded by my little monkey

  2. Tamara says:

    Being a mum i learned that to a lot of baby related things there is no wrong or right.. a mum has to trust her instincts – and also, if that instinct is telling you to enjoy 30 minutes without your baby, its perfectly fine. If mum is happy, then the baby is happy and vice versa 😉

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